Cord Cutting

Cord cutting is one of those witchy things that everyone has an opinion about. Some think it’s excessively difficult to do, and only a professional Witch can do it properly. Others believe it is incredibly beneficial for anyone who wants to do it, and relatively easy to do (I fall into this camp).

It has been one of my most highly requested pieces of content and so I created a video tutorial on YouTube on how to do it, which I’ve linked below, that has now become my most popular piece of video content.

Yet, it’s still a topic I keep shying away from discussing in other areas (blogs, tik toks, IG posts) due to it’s controversial nature. In saying this, please remember you do not have to always agree with me or any other Witch on the internet.

Take what resonates and leave the rest.

What Is Cord Cutting?

We can often find ourselves through life in an attachment with another person, that is no longer beneficial. In fact, sometimes, these attachments can be downright bad for us.

This person may be pulling you down and making you feel really negative and drained or you may not be able to move on with your life because they’re living rent free in your head.

They may be an abusive or controlling ex, it could be a toxic friend, a narcissistic mother or just be someone who doesn't make you feel good to be around, but some for some reason you feel drawn to them or stuck to them, and you can't get them out of your mind or your life.

A cord cutting ceremony is NOT for petty arguments, everyday disagreements, revenge or teenage drama.

This ritual should be reserved for relationships that are harming you mentally, physically or spiritually as these are the times when a cord cutting ceremony can be really, really beneficial to you.

The aim of a Cord Cutting Ceremony is to sever the emotional and energetic attachment that you have to this toxic person in the spiritual realm. Sometimes those cords are strong, and we can’t get through it all the first time and that is ok, you’re allowed to do it more than once if necessary.

A small note here to say that if this person is placing you in physical danger, you will need to ensure you have other protections in place such as restraining orders, a safe place to stay, security cameras and safety locks on your home. This ritual does NOT take the place of necessary safety precautions.

A cord cutting ceremony or ritual can be really emotional to do. This might be a person that you have invested years and years of time and emotions with. It could be a family member, spouse, lover, long time friend and there could be a lot of reasons why this is really, really difficult to do, and that's okay, journal your thoughts an emotions, take your time and baby steps are totally ok.

Just make sure to do it when you're ready, and when you feel safe and like you can truly let go and that this is the right step forward. We don’t want to do this ritual during a heated moment of anger or rage, it’s best to choose this ritual when you are feeling emotionally stable.

Cord cutting will help you to move on with your life, and it encourages them to move on with theirs too. Don’t be surprised if you suddenly do not care one bit about what happens to that person.

How to do a cord cutting?

There's a couple of different ways you can go about a cord cutting ceremony. You can do it purely in the mind as a visual representation of what's going to happen. Or you can do this with props. So depending on what sort of person you are, is going to depend which way calls to you. I'm going to tell you about the one with props first because that will give you a good idea, and then you can make up your mind from there.

CANDLE METHOD

This one gets a bad wrap in the witchy community. Some Witches believe because it’s been shown in movies/television that means it’s wrong. I disagree. Sometimes using a physical representation like this can be incredibly powerful so don’t listen to the haters and pick the method that feels right to you.

Start with two candles, preferably ones that have really long wicks that can be tied together. Alternatively you can buy twin candles that share the same wick. These are usually hand dipped candles so you will need to melt the bottom onto a plate if you don’t have a proper candle holder.
If you can’t find this style of candle, a standard chime candle and some string works just as well. Position the candles on a plate or tray, and tie twine around them that the flames can burn through as the candles melt.

The candles should be a chime/wish candle size that takes approximately 2 hours to burn, bigger does not always mean better.

Optional;
- You can carve your name on one candle with a pen or skewer, and the other person's name on the other candle.
- Carve any sigils that you want or have created for that person or for yourself
- Write that you're wanting to be free, wanting to be free of any attachment. Whatever you believe will put power into it. This can also be added to petition paper burned with the flame of these candles
- A pink candle is really good for a friendship or someone that you really truly love/d
- Red might be for a sexual relationship or something that was very intense, maybe something you felt was a twin flame or a karmic connection.
- Blue candles are good for family members.
- White or Black are always great options as well.
- Dressing the candle in chilli flakes can speed it up but use sparingly, and do NOT use these for abusive relationships as sometimes this can intensify the situation.

Start by cleansing yourself and your space. Tie the two candle wicks together, or add your string to connect them and have them both sitting on their plate. Then you're going to stop, take a few deep breaths, ground your energy and begin to imagine yourself over one of the candles, and and the image of the other person over the other candle. (You can use a photograph that you put under the candle or you could even glue a photo of the two of you onto the wick, or placed above/below if you have trouble visualising).

This method is showing you a visual representation of you two together, breaking apart. You will want to allow the candles to burn completely down, breaking through the string if used. It can be helpful to read the wax afterwards too as a form of divination (carromancy) which is really helpful for telling you the result of your ceremony.

STRING METHOD

This method is relatively similar to the candle method but simply using a string on it’s own. Cleanse your space beforehand and make sure you’re in a stable emotional state.

Again, you might take a picture of you both together and attach it to the middle of the string with tape, or even take solo pictures of you both, taping them at opposite ends.

You can make this ceremony your own and the more creative or personalized you make it, the more power it will have.

Take a moment to ground yourself, envision this cord that is tying you both together, and see this as a phsyical representation of what is happening in the astral or spiritual realm.

Now to sever it. You want to cut through this string (and photo of you both if taped in the centre) that represens the attachment the two of you have together. You can use scissors, a dagger, athame, knife or even the flame of a candle to break this energetic attachment. It's a nice simple one as you technically just need a piece of string.

I recommend disposing of the string in the trash and then dabbing some protection oil onto your body, saying a prayer of thanks to the universe for the lessons learned.

VISUALISATION METHOD

Lastly, my personal favorite, you can indeed cut cords through mental visualization. No tools or props necessary.

I recommend you begin in your sacred space, set the tone for the room to help yourself get into the right headspace. You may want to have candles lit, perform some smoke cleansing prior and bring your crystals close if they make you feel safer and ready to perform a working.

Drop into a meditative state, the deeper the better. Take your time with this, you want optimal focus.

Visualize yourself as your spiritual auric body, it helps to envision your aura like a bubble of light surrounding you.
Now look for a cord, this cord is an energetic attachment, it often comes from our stomach near the solar plexus chakra, but yours may be connected elsewhere.

Think of it almost like an umbilical cord, and if you have seen the movie Donnie Darko, it's similar to how we see those big cords running out of him, but I find mine are much smaller.

This energetic cord connects you to this other person. Follow the cord and you’ll likely now see their aura and their energy. For this type of work, distance and time do not matter. So you can do this effectively, no matter where they are in the world, and even for someone who has died yet you still feel their influence.

I want you to see how that cord looks.
Is it strong? Is it dirty? Is it pink? Is it decaying?
How does it look? How does it feel?
Really visualize what this cord connection looks like.

Once you have a firm visual, you need to sever this cord. Some people like to physically do a cutting motion with their hand, or with an athame through the air, where they see this cord in their minds eye. Others do it purely in their minds eye and the key with this one, it's a little bit different to the others is to tell those cord ends where to go.

After being cut, those cords are flailing about in the middle of nowhere, and they can often reattach. So you want to imagine both ends being put into the ground, we call this earthing. With the intention that their cord will not connect back to you again.

WHAT IF I’M NOT READY?

If you know you need to do this, but are not quite ready to let this relationship go, you can take an extra step here and imagine a brand new cord going from you to this other person except this new cord is healthy, and it is flowing with light pink or white light, full of good energy.

This can work to repair a relationship and sometimes it's not the best choice to completely cut someone out, so this step can help repair or buy you time if you're not quite ready, it just makes things a little bit less toxic.

If you're definitely wanting to completely cut them off, cut that cord, pop it into the ground and then close down your aura as you come back into yourself and come out of your meditative state.

Once complete, see how it feels to you. Do you feel different? After a few days pass, has anything changed in your phsyical realm?

If it was a really strong attachment, you may need to try this a couple of times and that's okay. That is normal. It just depends on that energetic attachment that you have with that person.

The best moon phases for this work are during the full moon, waning phases or dark moon.

I really hope this helps you, please leave me a comment with how you felt after completing this cord cutting ritual.

I wish you all the luck in the world in stepping into a place of better, safer and healthier alignment for you.

Still need help? Not sure whether this is the right step to take?
I can help you with a guidance call or my quick fix spell advice.

A guidance call is perfect for more complex situations as we can perform some divination to double check if this is the right step for you. I can walk you through the ritual, hold energetic space as you perform this ritual and help you pick the best timing too.

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Meet Hana

Hana O’Neill, the Suburban Witch is a professional Tarot & Astrology reader, Intuitive Coach and the host of the Witch Talks podcast.

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